The title of my most recent exhibition (Space Gallery April 12-May 18, 2024) comes from a quote from one of my favorite books, Too Loud a Solitude, by Czech writer Bohumil Hrabil. The main character and bibliophile Hanta says,
“Lost in my dreams, I somehow cross at the traffic signals, bumping into street lamps or people, yet moving onward…my briefcase is full of books and that very night I expect them to tell me things about myself I don't know.”
After 25 years in the studio–a place of deep solitude, I realize I receive each painting in this way–as an encounter that will tell me things about myself I don’t know. To me it’s like doing dreamwork or having a subconscious dialog with the psyche. And I get a sense that within this space is a doorway to the collective unconscious, the realm of archetype, ancestors and spirit. The final compositions are organized records of the resolve and revelation of these interactions.
This practice has taken me on a ride that I could not have imagined. I guess I am an accidental artist in that I never thought about being a painter as a child or attended art school. It seems that painting has a plan for me that I am still figuring out and I am quite happy not knowing what’s next.
I was so lucky to become an artist in Denver, a nurturing place in which I showed my earliest work at humble venues such as cafes and hair salons with a supportive and kind audience. This positive initial experience gave me a foundation, real encouragement, and deep trust to keep making and sharing my work. I now have collectors, commissions, and collaborations all across the US and overseas including Macao, Singapore, Nanjing, Dubai, Edinburgh, Amsterdam, and Sydney, among other places.
This path continues to expand my world–both inner and outer–and reminding me constantly that my cleverness, wishes, and ambitions often get in the way. I have mostly listened and continue to try my best to show up, do the work, and let the work say what it needs to say.
Some of the ways in which I translate this experience of painting is with the use of techniques, symbols and themes including the following:
Hard edges - On a foundational level, most of my work is arrangements of hard edge shapes that serve as building blocks. The clean, definite lines make a dialog of shapes, colors, and textures that also allows for an architectural approach. I may paint this way because I used to sew; my mother sewed dresses and costumes for me; and my grandmother hand-stitched quilts for every single family member. I love the bringing together, the control and containment the hard edges provide for dealing in the abstract.
Repeating patterns - The repetition of shapes again is tied to quilting and also reminds me of the practice of mantra or a word or sound repeated to aid concentration in meditation. Ultimately the repetition will build to create a vibration or an effect. I also like that visual repetition provides a rhythm and a foothold for the viewer within the seemingly groundless space of abstraction.
Altar Arrangement - Sometimes I see the work as an arrangement of elements like one might place objects upon an altar. The placement is carefully planned with the intention to hold space for transcendence, magic and higher knowing. (Examples: Private Myth, Lamplighter)
Protector/Warrior/Healer Arrangement- Many of my compositions have “shoulders” and to me are almost figurative. I imagine these entities are protectors, warriors or healers from the subconscious, spiritual, or ancestral plane. (Examples: Double Arrow, Private Myth, Dream Dress)
Dress shapes / Dressmaker Pattern Pieces - Sometimes my compositions are dress-like or feature shapes like those from a sewing pattern. In my mind then the “dress form” provides a canvas within the canvas for holding shapes and colors together that ultimately function to clothe. The extension of the purpose of the clothing is to transform the wearer into a healer, an actor, a participant in ritual, and so on. (Examples: Dream Dress, Cascade, Seamstress)
Costume / Mask - Related to the dress idea, I sometimes make compositions that are costume-like and again hold a purpose for transporting the wearer as well as the observer. In this way costumes provide a portal to alternate realms including the imagination, the ethers, and ancestral plane. Additionally, costume also wields the power to unify through shared agreement in suspension of the rational mind as in theater/film/ritual. (Examples: Dream Dress, Mask)
Oracle/ Fortune Teller - I like the idea of these roles in that they offer conscious possibilities, alternate paths, different perspectives on our multi-faceted, infinitely complex selves that exist unbounded by time. (Examples: Oracle, Circus Tent)
Headpiece - As an ongoing theme in my work, headpiece compositions represent focusing the mind on another realm, or placing something on the head that would open one up to visions or channeling. (Examples: Viewfinder, Crosshairs)
Shield shape - A contained “shield” shape composition holds things together, creates a unified field that offers protection and embodies meaning for the wielder. (Example: Indigo Lens, Lava Line, Golden Lenses)
Mirroring - A lot of my work has mirrored shapes and reminds me of the face cards in a deck of cards or the reversed interpretations in tarot. It also represents “as above, so below;” the concept of the micro/macro; the power our beliefs have in informing or creating our outer lived lives. (Examples: Heart Mirror, XO, Distillation)
Black and white stripes - In Sanskrit, the word Guru comes from the roots 'gu' meaning darkness or ignorance; and 'ru' meaning remover of that darkness. So in my work the black and white stripes represent transformation–moving from dark to light–through learning or awakening.
Circles - Circles are used for establishing a drishti or focal point for gathering the mind into a concentrated place. They are also used for directing the eye as well as creating a subconscious geometry and visual rhythm.
Translucent Circles - Often represent lenses and ideas around seeing from the mental and emotional aspects. Our lens on the world is colored by our thoughts, feelings, and beliefs. Also, lenses relate to ideas around microscopes and telescopes, how changing perspective can increase understanding and compassion.
Translucent shapes - I love how translucence feels spiritual and otherworldly. Layering translucid shapes not only brings depth to the painting, the interaction of the subtle colors also creates new and surprising secondary shapes, as well as unusual additions to the overall palette.
Black Circle - A peephole to the unknown, the universe, the abyss.
Black Rectangle - References the constant presence of the void, the unknown as a balancer/bringer of chaos for all equations and assumptions.
Colored squares - Stable places for calibration, to reset the eye, bounce color, add anchoring.
Faux 3D - I make suggestions of 3D in my work. It is often not precise or accurate, but hints at another dimension–if only subconsciously.
Chaotic Brushwork - To represent chaos, primordial matter, the unformed, unrealized potential .Also to leave areas of the canvas more painterly, less controlled.